This month our focus is on valuing our teens in order to teach them how to take pride in who they are and what they can accomplish. Your teenager lives in a “today” world and doesn’t much think about the “tomorrow” world unless you are talking about senior prom or college. And those are just vague ideas that have rainbows and lollipops dancing all around them!

Our teens need to learn that so many of the decisions, efforts, and choices that they are making right now will directly affect their future. But if they don’t value who they are or take pride in what they do right now, how can we expect them to understand the importance of some far off distant future?

Please take a moment to watch this second video on how we can help our teens value themselves to the point of caring!

Does it seem like your teenager just doesn’t care about their grades or their attitude or even your opinion?

How can you help your teenager value themselves?

One way you can do that is to take some time to remind them where our ultimate value comes from.

As believers, our identity comes from who we are in Christ. I want to share with you a reading we use in our Manhood/Womanhood Rite of Passage for 12th graders. It was written by Dr. Ed Laymance and it is full of biblical truth that reminds us as believers we are a “Child of the King”

Because of who Jesus Christ is, and
because He is my Savior and my Lord:
I am a child of the King of Kings and Lord of Lords,
seated with Christ in the heavenly realm. I am chosen, accepted,
and included – a citizen of heaven and a member of God’s household.
I am loved by God unconditionally and without reservation.
I belong to Him, having been bought by Him with the
precious blood of Jesus. I have eternal life and will be
saved from all of God’s wrath to come – guaranteed!
I am a Christian. I am not just different in what I do.
My identity has changed. Who I am has changed. Everything has
become brand new.
I am a dwelling place in which God lives by His Spirit.
I have access to Him anytime, anywhere, for any reason.
I am God’s creation – His workmanship. I was created by Him
and for Him, so who I am and what I do matters.
I am spiritually alive. I have been set free from the fear of death
and have been given life to live and enjoy to the full.
I am forgiven – completely, totally, and absolutely.
I have been rescued from the dominion of darkness and
brought into the Kingdom of light – the Kingdom of the Son.
I have been set free from the penalty of sin and the power of sin.
I am an enemy of Satan and at war with spiritual forces of evil, but
greater is He that is in me than he that is in the world.
If God is for me, it doesn’t matter who or what stands against me,
because nothing and no one can separate me from the love of Christ –
not hurt, pain, loss, problem, or brokenness;
not persecution, trouble, difficulty, or danger;
not abandonment, abuse, addictions, or appetites;
not desires, food, sexuality, or relationships;
not life or death, angels or demons;
not my past, the present, or the future;
no power, no person, no place, not anything in all creation;
not even Satan himself shall prevail.
I am in the hands of Jesus, in the hands of God, and nothing and
no one can snatch me out of God’s hands.
I will fear no evil because God is with me, and
He has promised to never leave me nor forsake me.
God’s presence is with me everywhere I go –
to the heights of heaven,
through the valley of the shadow,
to the ends of the earth – forever and always.
I am a child of the King and choose this day to live as one

Harnessing your spiritual influence

What is a baked potato without a steak? French fries without a juicy hamburger? Salad dressing without a salad (for those healthy eaters)? It is incomplete and somehow lacking. The same goes for the spiritual teaching in our teenager’s life if we as parents don’t become actively involved. The youth ministry was never intended to be the sole source of spiritual training.

Ask yourself this question. Who do I depend on to teach my teenager the precepts of God? This question is often easy to answer but very hard to admit. You don’t need a degree in theology to have confidence in teaching your teenager about who God is and what you believe. You just need His confidence. It’s called God-confidence.

I encourage you to watch this month’s video regarding your role vs. the role of your youth ministry in the spiritual education of your teen. It will give you a good idea on how to become involved: http://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/62786302/51734c2974

I am excited as this new school year starts to work with you, resource you, and encourage you to lead your teens in this faith journey.  I am available any time you might need help, prayer, or a listening ear.  This is just the beginning of good resources we will be sending throughout the year.  

Sibling Rivalry

Have you ever heard that silence can be loud?  It’s that very loud, very obvious absence of sound after your teenager has just had another argument with their sibling and stomped off in the other direction.  Does it ever stop?  Do they really love each other?  We will be discussing sibling rivalry in this entry and what you, as the parent, can do to foster relationship between your teen and their sibling(s).

Please take a moment and watch this 3 minute and  47 second video that may help give you some idea as to what is going on in their heads.https://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/60761630/c5128ceae7

This isn’t an easy issue by a stretch.  We are dealing with unique individuals with specific ideas that haven’t learned yet that the idea they are holding so tightly to very possibly could be flawed.  This might actually come as a surprise to your teen.  Teenagers react very passionately to perceived injustices.

It reminds me of Luke 9 when Jesus was speaking to His disciples after His transfiguration.  It should have been one of the most spiritually encouraging events for his disciples but somehow it ended up in an argument about who had more importance to Jesus among the Twelve.  Sibling rivalry.  All Jesus had to say was, “Whoever is least among you, this one is the greatest.”

We have to teach our teens that it’s about others.  But first our actions will be much louder than our words!

The Power of an Apology

Teenagers learn by watching their parent’s example more than anything else. There is no better way to teach your teenager important life skills than to model them each day.  One of the life skills that marks maturity the most is when your teenager learns to accept responsibility for what they have done.

Please take 3 minutes and 18 seconds and watch this video that gives a clear example of how you can help your teenager learn this important life skill. http://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/58729615/5464b55bdd

In Jesus’ first public sermon recorded in Matthew 5 there is a hidden gem that might be easily missed.  It is nestled between two scandalous statements about murder and lawsuits. You might skim past it if you’re not looking for it.

In Matthew 5: 23-24 Jesus said that if you come to worship to leave an offering and are reminded of a conflict against a friend, go seek reconciliation with urgency. Then return to the altar and offer the gift of worship.

My question for you today is how could you live the truth of that Scripture today in your home?

Here are some thoughts to get you started answering that question:

• Forgiveness Matters- Jesus prioritized forgiveness and reconciliation in this passage. It is essential to healthy relationships and families.
• Don’t Wait- There is a sense of urgency in this passage. Jesus placed importance on pursuing reconciliation quickly.
• Forgiveness Unleashes Worship- After reconciliation takes place there is an invitation to return to worship God in freedom.

Here are some quick questions to end with today:

• Is there conflict in your home that you are concerned about right now?
• Are you seeking reconciliation with urgency?
• Are you prioritizing forgiveness in your relationships?
• Would your teenager say that your home is a place of grace?
• Let Jesus’ words inspire you today to experience peace in your home and pursue reconciliation in your family.

Feel free to share with me your thoughts about this online parenting class. I look forward to connecting with you next month.Our student ministry has your back in this parenting adventure. If you need someone to talk to, pray with, or someone to just listen please let us know.

The Power of a Symbol

I want to talk to you today about symbols.  A symbol is an object that has meaning attached to it, but it is also a great tool in the parent’s tool belt.

Here are some examples of important symbols you may have in your life that carry important meaning:

·         a wedding ring

·         refrigerator art from when your teenager was a child

·         a family heirloom that was passed down to you

·         a moment in time that was captured in a photograph

·         an item from your childhood home that takes you back in time when you look at it

Symbols are powerful.  Today I would like to suggest that you harness the power of symbols to help pass down faith to your teenager.

Here is a 3 minute and 13 second video that helps you do that.  Just click on the link below:

https://vimeo.com/parentministry/review/54562229/9a4e22dcc5

This online Parenting Class is my way to encourage you as a parent.  Your job is so important, and our student ministry is cheering you on as you pass down faith to your teenager. Some of you might not feel like you have faith to pass on to your teens, if you would like to talk about that with me, also if you have prayer requests, or just need to discuss something about your child, please send me an email. 

 Cheering you on!